Don't Give Up
by serotonin
Summary: This is a songfic to the tune of Don't Give Up, about Alanna when she is older, is a little bit angsty.


I was in a sad mood today, and after hearing this song, inspiration struck. I'm sorry if you don't like it but it's my first song fic so please r/r.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of this, it all belongs to the goddess of fiction Tamora Pierce. The song belongs to Peter Gabriel and Kate Bush. I changed the words a little so that they would fit better.  
  
  
  
In this proud land we grew up strong  
  
We were wanted all along  
  
I was taught to fight, taught to win  
  
I never thought I could fail  
  
Alanna slowly walked down the empty hall of her castle. Now that the wars were over and Tortall had no enemies, only allies, there was no need for knights. Besides, Alanna was getting old, and wasn't as good as she had been in her youth.  
  
No fight left or so it seems  
  
I am a woman whose dreams have all deserted  
  
I've changed my face, I've changed my name  
  
But no one wants you when you lose  
  
Slowly reaching the door to her bedroom, Alanna opened it and went inside. She sat down in one of the comfy chairs, thinking of her life so far. George had died only a few years back, as well as Alan and Alianne, from the fever that had struck so many. Thom had gone, she didn't know where, but had last been seen getting on a boat for Catharki three years back.  
  
Alanna had tried to find a place to go, somewhere where the memories didn't haunt her. But where could she go? No one needed a Lady Knight who was getting old and rusty.  
  
Don't give up  
  
'Cos you have friends  
  
Don't give up  
  
You're not beaten yet  
  
Don't give up  
  
I know you can make it good  
  
Jon had tried to get her something to do, but nothing had suited her, besides what fun was being a knight when you had to sit a desk all day long? But Jon had tried, and so had her other friends, but it hadn't worked. So she had gone home to look after her people.  
  
Though I saw it all around  
  
Never thought I could be affected  
  
Thought that we'd be the last to go  
  
It is so strange the way things turn  
  
She'd tried her hardest to keep the castle up and running, but most people these days were moving to the larger cities, like Corus or somewhere foreign. But still, she hadn't thought that the people of Pirates Swoop would leave. It was such a nice place.  
  
Drove the night toward my home  
  
The place that I was born, on the lakeside  
  
As daylight broke, I saw the earth  
  
The trees had burned down to the ground  
  
She had returned to Trebond just last year. It was changed. There had been a forest but it was gone and the castle had burnt down, to be replaced by a plainer home, larger then normal, but still it wasn't a castle. Coram wasn't there and neither was Rispah. But their daughter, Elani, was looking after the fief for them. She had said that a group of warriors had come and burnt the place down five years back, and that Coram, Rispah and baby Joseph had been killed.  
  
Don't give up  
  
You still have us  
  
Don't give up  
  
We don't need much of anything  
  
Don't give up  
  
'Cause somewhere there's a place  
  
Where we belong  
  
Rest your head  
  
You worry too much  
  
It's going to be alright  
  
When times get rough  
  
You can fall back on us  
  
Don't give up  
  
Please don't give up  
  
  
  
Resting her head on her hands, Alanna remember the day that Raoul had died. Jon had held her as the tears flowed, Gary by their side. They had been so kind to her, making sure that she was ok before leaving her to mourn in peace.  
  
They had tried to get her to leave with them that day. They were going to go to the Yamini Islands, to begin a new life, and Jon was going to leave Roald in charge. She had refused, and so they had not gone. They were still trying to get her to go, and she was very nearly ready to say yes.  
  
'Got to walk out of here  
  
I can't take anymore  
  
Going to stand on that bridge  
  
Keep my eyes down below  
  
Whatever may come  
  
And whatever may go  
  
That river's flowing  
  
That river's flowing  
  
Getting up slowly, Alanna went to the study, pulling out a fresh piece of paper and began to write a letter to Jon, saying that yes, she would go with them to the islands, and when did they leave. She was getting tired of being alone, and wanted to be with her friends, being happy, for the last few years of her life.  
  
Moved on to another town  
  
Tried hard to settle down  
  
For every job, so many men  
  
So many men no-one needs  
  
When they had got there, there had been nothing for them to do. They had been welcomed by the emperor and given a large, empty castle to live in. But there had still been nothing for them to do. For the Yamimi's, like Tortall, had no enemies now and had no need for aging knights, or even teachers.  
  
Don't give up  
  
'Cause you have friends  
  
Don't give up  
  
You're not the only one  
  
Don't give up  
  
No reason to be ashamed  
  
Don't give up  
  
You still have us  
  
Don't give up now  
  
We're proud of who you are  
  
Don't give up  
  
You know it's never been easy  
  
Don't give up  
  
'Cause I believe there's a place  
  
There's a place where we belong  
  
Alanna sat on the balcony, her sword on the table in front of her. 'This is it,' she thought. She had finally seen that the only place left for her to go was the black god's realm. It was time that she took that final step, and leave behind all the memories of sorrow and loss. She would see her family again, and Jon and Gary would soon follow her in, and they could all be together. Standing up, she walked over to the edge, and under her breath she sung one of the many 'Lioness' songs. One of love and life, of sorrow and heartbreak. Lifting her head high, she held her sword above her head as she jumped off the balcony, giving one last war cry.  
  
  
  
Sorry if it's a bit too sad, but I was thinking of the death of a friend and couldn't even think of anything happy, let alone write a happy fic. 


End file.
